what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize