I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
