Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
meet me or not, i'm out of control
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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