I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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