I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
