in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
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