I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize
