Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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