Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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