I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
