then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
You're a waste of cheezeits
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
