I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
