I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
