mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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