I think I just saw someone hide a body.
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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