She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
