Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize