so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize