smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
