Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
