why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i think i have two assholes
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
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