I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
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