I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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