It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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