Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
It's just like the Real World with babies
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
