Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I can tuck mytits in my pants
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
i dont even know how to be here
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
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