My Higher Power is John Stamos
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
