Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
