i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Randomize
