Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
