Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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