Me. At least after what I've been through.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize
