Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Randomize
