so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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