my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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