dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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