So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
