Kiss
Puke
I hate all girls vehemently.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Randomize
