i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
