Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
then he tried to convert me to islam
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
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