If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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