I just saw a hot homeless man
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Randomize
