oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
