Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
We have started to decorate penises.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
