dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize
