Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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