Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
there is glitter all over my balls
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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