Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
my liver is dry heaving
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
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