Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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