He disabled his match.com account in front of me
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
