I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
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